Week #2 - is IN THE CAN!

And what a week it was!   From Meltdown Monday to Fabulous Friday.   Someone told me that this would be a rollercoaster ride – but I had NO idea how true that statement would come to be.  

The week ended on a tremendous high note with the results of my bloodwork and a check-up with the oncologist to chat about how treatment was going.   I have almost no nausea and I’m taking no drugs (see Meltdown Monday post for more news on that!) to combat it – I simply feel great, and I’m eating well.   I’ve been out with friends every night this week and I’m getting more tired from my social life than I am from treatment.  LOL    

Ok, let’s chat about eating for a minute.  I was telling my oncologist about Naomi cooking great food for me and how incredibly well I’ve been eating through this whole thing.   My weight is unchanged since starting treatment and my energy level is getting back to where it was a few years ago.  Anyway, the doctor told me to tell Simon and Naomi that my treatment was going to last for 3 yrs and that I needed Naomi’s cooking all the way through!    She then offered to write me a prescription for it if I needed it.  :)   Thanks Naomi – you are an incredible chef!

My bloodwork 1 week post-chemo was great.  A few levels had dropped a bit (WBC, RBC and platelets) but were still well within the normal ranges.  This was the news I was a bit anxious to hear because prognosis is dependent on getting all rounds of chemo and you never know how your body might react to the chemo poisons.   Yippee!

Early in the week I had developed a deep, severe ache in the lower part of my right calf.  If you Google “chemo + leg pain” it returns  DVT blood clot – call doctor immediately!!   Yikes.   I love Google but it’s a dangerous thing for a fearful mind!    Luckily, I have doctor friends who I can call immediately.  :) (Yay friends!)   After a friendly chat I learn from Brian that it’s likely much ado about nothing (if you can call chemo related bone marrow issues “nothing”?).  It seems that the chemo affects me by hitting areas of my body that have sustained previous injury and is causing painful, transient muscle or bone flare ups (ok, that covers a lot of my body!).  The great news is that that is only pain ... I get a bit fearful when the words “blood clot” and “possible death” come into play but if there is one thing I know how to deal with, it’s pain.  And as I’ve said for the past 23 years – “pain can’t kill you .... unless it makes you jump off a bridge!”  ;)   

So, I’m rocking forward expecting some pain but knowing that it’s all part of the treatment and that the teeth-grinding pain in my legs is not a life threatening blood clot but simply part of the healing process ...  and when it wakes me up at 3am I smile and can go back to sleep.  

It’s strange.  I feel better partway through chemo-radiation than I have in about a year and a half.  My energy level is going up, I’m waking up at 5:30 am because I am raring to go (and not only because my mom has forgotten about time zones, again!).  I’m happy, optimistic and ready to meet life head-on again.  It’s a great feeling to be on the healthy side of an illness.  

Someone asked me to post some “real stuff” in the blog and not just the fun, happy stories.  Well, I’m thrilled to say that about 90% of what I go through is happy, heart warming, energy-boosting stuff.  The bad stuff is there (and I’ve written a bit about it - but there are some parts that really don't warrant being written about) but I’d prefer to focus of the power of the positive stuff and how to turn this whole thing into a happy memory rather than a sad or tortured one.
 

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Thursday, 11 Feb 2010.   I went to a funeral today.   It was hard - VERY hard.  I wasn't sure that I could handle such closeness of death -  my own prospective death. 

Peter was a force to be reckoned with.  We knew each other through the Calgary Outdoor Club (an amazing online recreational platform started by my friend Rhonda) and Peter and I had hiked together, skied together and even completed the Amazing Race (COC style) together.  Peter had an indomitable spirit that was infectious!  He had more energy than anyone I have ever encountered in life.  Rhonda delivered his eulogy beautifully; she captured just the right elements of his rags to riches story (Peter was a Vietnamese "Boat" person, separated from his family at age 12 by the communist rule and thrown on a boat to Canada) and a lot of funny anecdotes about his climbing and hiking adventures (once you met Peter  - you NEVER forgot Peter!).  Peter's adopted Canadian family spoke (I believe Peter adopted them as much (or more!) as they adopted him!) and it was a touching, heartfelt service.  The church was packed to the gills.

I'm not Catholic (I'm Anglican - it's what I refer to as the Cole's notes (Cliff's notes for my American friends) version of Catholicism) but I have to say that the long, Catholic service certainly does give your mind time to wander ... and wow!  did mine ever wander to some strange places that day!  I looked around the church at the burning candles and I was immediate taken by the fact that some of you have lit candles for my life, and others say prayers for me - what amazing gestures.  Thank you.  I came home and made some notes to accompany my will about how I want (or don't want!) my final farewell to be.

Dat Peter Vu was 42 years old.   He was diagnosed with liver cancer only a few short weeks before I was diagnosed.  Life is simply not fair. 

I went to radiation treatment after the service and I felt like the luckiest person in the world.  Because I am!  My cancer is treatable ... and potentially curable and I have an army of people pulling for me.  I am so damned blessed!  This funeral was a good way for me to pay my utmost respects to Peter but also to "see" more clearly about my own situation.

I went to a funeral today.  I learned a lot - about Peter, about my friends (thank you Rhonda!) but mostly about myself.  "Godspeed, my friend.  I'm sure I will see you on a mountain top in the future ... sorry but I'll be late because I'm taking my time here on earth. "

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Mark  (radiation guy) has offered to give me some stats and details about my specific treatment and to take some photos of me (and foam Lori) to show you how we all hang out together each day.  I’ll try to get that stuff up this week – it’s all rather cool and they are very proud of their profession and state of the art radiation machines ... and they are all so wonderful with the patients.  I feel like family there – we joke around non-stop and they’ve proclaimed me their favourite patient ... and I’ve proclaimed them “my favourite radiation team”!  :)

It's been gorgeous weather here (we express-posted our snow to Texas and the East Coast ... but we should have sent it to Vancouver!) and Graffiti and I are REALLY enjoying our daily walks after treatment. That's the park at the hospital with the cityscape in the background. See? No snow!! Sunny and +7C (that's about 45F American degrees.  hehe)

On to week #3.  It’s an easy week coming up of just radiation and it will be topped off by a visit from Lin on Thursday.   She's coming for a week+ to bolster my spirits and help me get as prepared as possible for the next sets of chemo.  What amazing friends I have!  :)

Note to self:  buy wine, wine and more wine!   It’s girls’ weekend at my house  - drop on by!  :)